Games And Bullshit

So, I have one more day in the weekend beta for Wildstar, I honestly think this game is going to me so huge, and so amazing. Really, if there is something that you don’t like about it, talk to me, I would like to hear it. The graphics alone are amazing. I understand how something that looks so cartoonish could be a turn off for some, but I personally like it. The game play is a lot of fun. The quests are solid, easy at first, you know, so you can get a feel for the game. I can’t wait to get further in the game. The raids look so promising, challenging, and rewarding upon completion. I am also really looking forward to the social aspect of this game. Not only playing with my friends, but maybe making new friends to play with as well. If you can’t tell, I am super excited about this game

I have also been playing Conception 2. I won’t lie it is a fun play. The idea of it is really awesome. Star babies. I am all about that. Even though I like it, I was a bit let down by it. I guess I was just expecting more, I will continue to play it, to see if I change my mind at all. It isn’t a bad game, I’m just not feeling it at the moment. Anything is better than Bravely Default though. What a fail of a game that was. Sorry if you like it. The game play itself was fantastic. The jobs and such were a lot of fun. The game really could have gone places, if the story wasn’t such crap, and if the characters where actually, I don’t know, not terribly annoying.

On that note I will continue to replay Tales Of Symphonia and Diablo 3 until something better comes my way. I have to keep myself busy. Might as well do something that I enjoy,

I spent the last three hours on Skype playing a came called Call of Cthulhu, with my lady friend and her husband. I had a blast. The story we played was about this sleep study office that had these monster type things coming to life out of dreams, causing night terrors, violent sleepwalking, and all of this other stuff as well. We had to solve the mystery of this place and find out what the fuck was going on. There was a lot of creepy shit, death, and blood. I loved it. I got a good chunk of my arm bitten off and took a tumble down some steps, but I made it out alive, we all did. I can’t wait to play again.

I really want to try to play more table top games. I know that the dudes I hang around with are putting together a D&D game, so this excites me. We are working on the characters and rules as of right now. I also asked my other group of friends if they would be down to hang out and play some sort of table top with me every once in a while. Theses are my less nerdy friends, so I am unsure of what the response might be, but they do enjoy spending time with me, so my hopes are high, but not too high.

Also, if you read this, thanks.

I am also not going to proofread this until later so, my apologies.

PAX East And Pure Awesome.

Last weekend I was lucky enough to attend PAX with a good friend of mine. 

I honestly thought about selling the passes that I got. I would have made A LOT of money off of them. I didn’t though, obviously, and that was an excellent choice on my end. I had more fun than I can even describe. It was also more fun than I have had in months. It was truly an amazing experience. A great time with great people.

I don’t think that I have ever been surrounded by so many people in my entire life. Well, maybe a few times at really large concerts, but nothing like this. I think one of my favorite parts had to be the fact that whenever someone would bump into you, they would say sorry. 

I saw some fun panels, bought a lot of stuff. My shirt collection is on point. Too bad I work so much and never get a chance to wear them that often. 

Anyway, I am super excited for Wildstar. I was before I got there, but fangirling all over the Wildstar booth really made be fall for the game. I played the beta for a bit this weekend, it was a good time indeed. 

Not only was my PAX date so much fun to explore the convention with, I also talked to a bunch of other people, and met some new friends. 

One sad thing that I discovered during this trip is that you tend to get further acting like a dumb girl than you do by being a knowledgeable girl gamer. That just might be with the people at Riot though, who knows, it was sad nonetheless, especially in this day and age. 

Anyway, I hope to get lucky enough to go again next year. 

Some People Have Real Problems.

Sometimes, I slip. I crack. I go through a lot, yeah I know, many others deal with more than I do, but for me, it’s a lot. From time to time I can’t hold it in anymore and something will happen to make my have an emotional breakdown. When this happens I always try to write it out only to come to the same to conclusions every time.

One. Some people have real problems.

I have so many great things in my life. The most loving and caring family any girl could ever ask for.

I have an army of sarcastic nitwits that have never left my side in the last fifteen years. (okay, it is really thirteen, but fifteen just sounds better.)

I have so many friends who try to get me out of hermit mode. I should start listening. It will be good for my soul.

I’ve got this awesome man who I’d do anything and everything for, and he’d do the same for me.

I have a job that allows me to live, comfortably, on my own, in New Jersey.

I have an awesome cat.



I’m breathing.

Yep. I’ve got it pretty good.

Two. PMS is a whore that makes me over emotional and question my self worth once a month causing these psychotic rants.

Now that I am feeling like my normal self, thank goodness, I can start working on the post that I have been meaning to write.

Every Story Has… More Sides Than You Would Think.

So, as it turns out, I have pissed some people off with my story telling. This isn’t the first time this has happened, and I am sure that it won’t be the last. To be honest, I was just telling a story. It was a mistake on my part, I forgot the person followed me on most of my social media. I tend to be self absorbed, that’s okay, it is a part of who I am. No one is perfect. 

Just to clear some things up. What was written, was written over a year ago. I posted it to remind myself that I am not that person anymore. Thank Goodness.  


Anyone who actually knows me personally knows that in the course of the last few years I turned into this person who I didn’t even know anymore. It was no ones fault but my own for letting it happen, but it did and I can’t change it, nor do I think that I would. 

Every action has an equal and opposite reaction, or whatever. 

























































To be honest. I am glad too. I wish someone would have given me a heads up as to what I was getting myself into. haha. 



used to be one of the rotten ones and I liked you for that.

All that I want is some sleep. It has gotten to the point where I am just so very cranky. People can speak in the wrong tone and I want to rip them apart, and I have, in my mind. I guess this is what a child feels like after skipping nap time. I need sleep and it just isn’t happening. I need sleep and some sort of comfort. This is the thing that I would like about being in a relationship, the part I miss. Having a body next to me and feeling completely safe and secure. I have not felt that in over a year, I do truly miss it. I guess I just have to suck it up until I have what I am looking for. At least I have my cat. 

sunday. sunday. sunday.

Today was the first day that I had to myself in a while. I didn’t do a damn thing and I am okay with that. Most people would view that as a wasted day but my body and mind needed some time away from everything.

I woke up to my cat digging her claws into my face. My girl is never goes for my face, ever, so this confused me on so many levels. It turns out, she has just as much grace as I do and rolled off the bed… In an attempt to save herself so she latched on to the closest thing to her, my face.

Not soon after that my family paraded into my apartment with all of my spring and summer clothes that I left at my parent’s house. It was nice seeing them, if only for a little while. And yes, I have lived in my apartment for five months now, and I still have a butt ton of crap at their house. For some reason I feel as though by the time I get completely settled in here, I’ll be moving again. This is my life.

The boys all came over today for Anime Sunday. I stayed in my room and played Diablo with the one boy who didn’t show up to the event. Seriously though, I played for eight hours straight. I went from level 15 to 40. I am not terrible at the game and I have a friend to play with, so in my head it is something fun, that is kind of social. At one point I did take a break, only to start up again shortly after. For some reason I just needed to keep busy and absorbed in something, that escape from life, or what have you. I have been playing games nonstop as of late. My mind has been all over the place and it is the only thing that I can seem to focus on. At least I have that. I do feel bad neglecting my other hobbies though. I am sure everything will balance out with time. It always does. Anyway, if anyone is reading this, and you happen to play Diablo, check out the new expansion. It is a lot of fun.

PAX East is in a few days and I feel as though I should be excited for it. For some reason I’m not. Maybe when I get there it will hit me. Or maybe it is just that this week is an emotional hurdle that I have to get through. I know once this weekend passes things will be a bit more smooth. The date of this weekend used to mean something to me, and just like that it has no meaning anymore. I think I am nervous that I will be upset about it. I know myself better than that though. I won’t be. I am a strong woman, I’ll be just fine and I need to stop worrying so much. Worst case scenario I’ll be in good company in a city that I have never been to before… What’s so bad about that? Exactly!

Habits are hard to break, sometimes.

Maybe I’ll elaborate on the undertones of this little rant later on. I am just not in the mood for anything emotional at the moment.. or ever, really.

I am however looking forward to telling you all about my experience in Boston and everything PAX related!



Growing up is an awesome experience to look back on. I have been an “adult” for several years now, though I only recently started to feel like one. 

Whenever I look back to my teenage years I always feel bad for any time that I might have been short with my mother, or any other problems that I might have caused. I mean, I wasn’t that bad of a kid, but teenagers are a mess. I guess they really can’t help it. I could have been a lot worse. 

It is almost as though one day I woke up and just realized what an amazing, strong woman she really is; how hard she works, everything she does for our family, friends, even strangers. When that happened I just did everything in my power to not add any additional stress to her life.

Okay, yeah, I should have helped her clean more, I am not the perfect daughter, but I really do try.  

I never used to think that I was close with my Mom, I am not sure if that is just what I felt, how it really was, or just the time period, but that isn’t the case anymore. I tell my mom everything that is going on in my life… If she wants to hear it or not. Sometimes I probably just talk at her, now that I think about it. We have the same sense of humor too, so I can joke around with her. It is kind of cool because she actually laughs at my jokes. I never knew that she is where I got my sarcasm from because she does it so well, I didn’t even know. 

My mom always wants to help everyone and anyone. I remember when Sandy came through, the neighbors’ house caved in, and she ran outside and tried to get them to come into our house… they didn’t, but I feel like she always does stuff like that. Not only with humans but animals too. I have a vague memory from when I was much younger, of a baby bird falling out of a tree at my grandma’s house and my mom trying to make sure it was okay, and nursing it back to health. She is filled with such compassion, a trait that almost seems nonexistent now a days.

I used to always get embarrassed when I would go places with my mom, not because she was embarrassing, but because she would talk to random people, and I thought that was really weird. Being from Jersey, you know that you don’t say “Hello.” to people when you pass them on the street, yet she would make a new friend anywhere we went. Now I know that my mom is just a happy, friendly person, that wants to share her happiness with the world, trust me, it needs it too.

Even if my mom is unhappy, she would never take it out on anyone. She always finds that silver lining, or makes some sort of joke, so you remember that life is really okay, that it could always be worse, and you really just need to laugh and smile. 

She always tries to see the best in people, and always tried to get me to do the same thing. I think it is finally starting to work. 

Once I realized that I am exactly like my mother, and embraced it, I became much happier. I am happy to have grown up into the person I am today, with the influence of such a wonderful lady. I am finally seeing how wonderful my life is. I was raised with so much love, and I am constantly surrounded by it. That alone is more than I can ever ask for. 


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Meanwhile, in Japan: Puzzle game Candy Crush hires girl’s nails as advertising space

Originally posted on RocketNews24:


Japan knows a thing or two about human billboards. And now, from the PR company that brought the world adverts stuck to girls’ thighs on the condition that the girls wear short skirts and knee-high socks, comes a brand new marketing idea: Candy Crush are sponsoring this girl’s fingernails, with a wacky, candy-based design that’s as bold and colourful as the game itself.

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I am the one who knocks (you out): Street Fighter meets Breaking Bad in genius animation

Originally posted on RocketNews24:

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The only thing we love more than videos about our favourite forms of entertainment are crossover videos that bring them together in one place. Doing precisely that, a talented British animator has just made our Monday that bit more bearable by posting a video titled “Ryu VS Jesse” to YouTube, which combines the worlds of much-loved video game Street Fighter and smash TV show Breaking Bad. And the result is simply awesome.

Full video after the jump.

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I am a really strong person. I can handle anything that is thrown at me. It might take a little bit to get there, but the end result is always me growing which is awesome. I’m trying really hard as of to always look on the bright side, to see that silver lining. To try and worry less.
Sitting in the ICU waiting room is a serious test.
We come from a line of strong women. We got this.